CAOSing

Before CAOS I went to meet Charlotte for a drink. I love Charlotte. She sometimes is the only one who keeps me sane. Yes, I think I am sane. Sometimes she does upset me most, but that comes with it, doesn't it? And it always turns out I'm just paranoid or she's been ill or upset and grumpy with me. Anyway, we've not had that for a while, just greatness. It would be nice to see her more though. We're managing once a week at the moment, which is good. Anyway, I had to much to talk at her - I was feeling really panicky in my stomach. There are many reasons for this, but I can only tell her all of them, I think. Actually, I can tell most people I know read this, but you won't get it as well.

Anyway, she made me feel better and off we went to CAOS. I sang in choir! Hee hee. But was really naughty and childish all the way through - giggling and talking. I think this was due to the feeling odd and 4 hours sleep and one bowl of pasta when technically I should have had all 3 meals by then. Oh well. But I've decided that I can't sing and don't like the music, so probably won't go again. Except that I get to sit next to Charlotte and see other ace people.

Orchestra was ok. I was being completely incompentent and I think our conductore was getting really pissed off with me. I don't care. If I'm not the best I shouldn't sit at the front, but everyone else refuses to, so I have to, then if I don't anything wrong the whole section gets confused. Oh well. I wasn't the worst. FACT. And I'll be better next week.

Afterwards I was persuaded to go to The Footage for karaoke. I think 2 wrongs make a right in this case! I did make people go to Abduls for food on the way, which make me feel worse. I'm so having trouble with eating. Strange. All night John (French John from the Halloween party) wouldn't stop talking to me, but that's cool. I told him numerous times that I wasn't listening. He kept going. I then decided that he should come to my house so he could keep talking and I would keep not listening, but it would probably help me sleep. For some reason he wasn't keen on this idea. I said he could just sit on a chair till I was asleep then go, but still not convinced.

So far today I have been lame! I didn't get up till 11.30 and that's BAD. Oops. But have had a big tidy and it's nearly properly tidy (that's NEVER happened before, so maybe I'm just being optomistic). Going to find some food now, cause forgot again.